Life Is Ocean : Myriad Of Emotions – Today’s emotion is ‘Validation’
There are two kinds of validation we struggle with when to chose what? how to respond like this and that? These two concepta are
- Emotional Validation For Others
- Emotional Validation For Self
Self- validation is something where one should always embrace and accept his/her internal and external thoughts and process, the way it is, without keeping an iota of doubt. Whereas, Emotional validation is the process by which we can learn, understand and approve the emotional experiences of others.
I strongly believe those who practice the self-validating process can only be mastered in emotional validation.
What Is Emotional Validation?
Validation is a non-judgmental process. It is defined by Oxford Languages as “recognition or affirmation that a person or their feelings or opinions are valid or worthwhile.” When we validate the feelings of others, we put ourselves in their shoes to understand their emotional experience and accept it as real.
Wikipedia says, “Emotional validation is the process of learning about, understanding and expressing acceptance of another person’s emotional experience. Emotional validation is distinguished from emotional invalidation, in which another person’s emotional experiences are rejected, ignored, or judged.”
Emotional validation helps us understand each other better, prevent conflicts, move towards a solution, increase closeness, and sense security.
Validating someone involves accepting who they are, where they are with their emotions, and how they perceive themselves. Validating someone essentially means we’re sending the person the message, “I see you. I’m here for you. I want to get to know your mind and heart. I want to know how you feel about what you have been through.” It also means, “I’m proud of how far you’ve come.”
Understand Validation Vs Invalidation
In the language of Google,
Validation is “The action of checking or proving the validity or accuracy of something; the act of making or declaring something legally or officially acceptable.”
Invalidation is “To make (an argument, statement, or theory) unsound or erroneous; deprive (an official document or procedure) or legal efficacy because of contravention of a regulation or law.”
Emotional invalidation can harm a relationship and have a significant impact on a person. This is why learning to validate others is so important.
Why Validation Is Important?
Validation is essential to meaningful connections. We all need validation at one time or another. Consistent and purposeful validation helps us to build relationships. Also, it helps in gaining…
1.) Acceptance: When you validate someone’s emotions, you are showing that you care about and accept them for who they are.
2.) Build relationships: People who show a great level of acceptance to each other feel more connected, which results in building stronger relationships in the future.
3.) Exposure Of Value: When you validate someone’s emotions on the ground of honesty and reliability, you reflect them their importance to you.
4.) Regulates Emotion: When people feel that they are listened to and understood by others, they feel under the influence of strong positive emotions. It encourages them to share with an open heart.
What Validation Process Required For Adults and Kids Both!
There are a number of things you can do to validate someone: It can be as simple to show the person that what they are saying matters by:
▶️ Be all your ears when someone is speaking
▶️ Look to that person, with whole interest
▶️ Keep all the gadgets away
▶️ Keep all the audio/visuals electronics off.
▶️ Just sit and be present physically and mentally both with the person
▶️ Give genuine and honest reactions verbally and non verbally both.
▶️ Do not be preacher at first, listen everything calmly, console and then show the best way to come out from whole thing.
Few ways to validate someone-
➡️ We are going to get through this.
➡️ Tell me more about
➡️ How are you feeling today?
➡️ Help me to understand what you’re thinking.
➡️ What happened?
➡️ Our family sticks together.
➡️ It makes sense that you feel..
➡️ Thank you for being someone I can trust.
➡️ It meant a lot to me when you..
➡️ How can I help?
➡️ I believe we can figure this out together.
➡️ I’m proud of you.
➡️ Your emotions make sense.
Invalidate Responses (Try To avoid them)
✅ See, It could be worse so better to leave things here only..
✅ You have never been a cry baby, you are strong enough
✅ you should feel lucky
✅ Don’t worry, things will sort out on its own.
✅ Oh! That’s Ok It’s not that big of a deal.
✅ You are too sensitive
✅ If you hadn’t done that it wouldn’t have happened.
Points To Remember:
✅ Validation does not mean that you agree with the person, but it can help defuse an argument by showing another person you understand them.
✅ Validation is NOT the acceptance of harmful behavior.
✅ It is absolutely not taking PITY on someone.
✅ Validation is a very important skill in developing and maintaining quality interpersonal relationships and also shows that you care about other people.
Do not get confused between Self Validation and Emotional validation. The basic requirement between both is ” To Listen.” Listen to your inner self, says former, and listening to others goes with the latter. In which you are good at? Would you like to share with me?
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I agree with you . Emotional Validation is truly important and in today’s world . Kids learn from us
Validation is truly important and in today’s world you could pick handful of people who are well aware of it
It’s really important to keep validating your emotions.
Accepting the values and respecting it is most important as of me to ensure we have a good relation with people
We are living in a world, where people lack self-validation as well as emotional validation. I hope such lessons are broadcasted vastly to improve life as a human.
Coincidently, I have also dealt with a similar issue in my V post. Yes, emotional validation is one of the greatest support we can offer to someone. You have very clearly explained the difference when we validate someone’s emotions and when we try to ignore them. Loved your post and could connect to it on many levels.
Emotional validation, learning, and acepting another person’s emotional experience are surely important for mental health and happiness. Loved this post with all pointers for why it’s important and ways to validate and what to avoid.
Emotional validation is an important subject we often experience but never really pay attention to. You have dissected it so well buddy
Self validation is very important to feel good about yourself and emotional validation helps to maintain good relationships. For me both are important but should me done in a righteous way.
I would second your points. Emotional validation is the biggest service we could do to any relationship. One can’t expect to have healthy relations if feelings aren’t given prominence; with self or others.
Agree with all the pointers and you have explained everything so well in the post. I also feel that many time people start preaching others without listening or understanding their real problems. and this thing make their existing condition more worse than better.
Well said, emotional validation of ourselves is very much needed, before we proceed to provide the same support for our kids. Kids learn from us and unless we practice it diligently, they will not learn it
Validation is very important. I am weak at self-validation but strong in emotional validation for others. Have to work on self though
Something very important for today’s world that has no time to understand the emotions of people, forget about validations.